I am grateful that today I got up with disturbed energy and beliefs, because I became aware of my pain body (like Eckhart Tolle calls it), and my dysfunctional beliefs taking over, my unwanted habit patterns trying to re-establish themselves, and the unwanted flavours arising in my inner world (as Rishiji would remark). I am grateful that I stayed with this awareness and that I remembered to pick up the book, 'Power of now', and read a few paras. I am grateful I could stay with the my inner body awareness for the rest of the morning. I am grateful that because of that, I could witness with a certain level of detachment the drama's playing out in my inner and outer worlds. I am grateful that these drama's therefore did not really have the pinch and punch that they would have normally have had and that so many possible 'mini dramas' that could have sprouted in the outer world, just made a half hearted appearance in my inner world instead and then fizzled out when I did not feed them further. I am grateful for my Sun God and for the sunshine that stayed with me through the entire experience, I am grateful for the undercurrents of love that could not just help being there. I am grateful for spring in the air. I am grateful for my higher levels of awareness and sharpness and quickness in catching the arising of those dysfunctional thought patterns of, 'poor old me', 'look the world (x,y,z) is out to torture me', 'how difficult life's circumstances (and people in it) are', 'it is so and so's fault', 'it has to be somebody's fault', etc. etc. .....whew!
I am grateful that so many unwanted flavours of my inner world decided to spring a joint attack on me today, because TODAY I was prepared for it! Tee heee..i am grateful for taking a warrior attitude, and adopting a 'Hero' metaphor and asking myself, 'Is this how a Hero will react?'.........I am grateful for shaking away the possibility of being a wimpy complaining whining cat and TAKING FULL RESPONSIBILITY for how my day will unfold today! I am grateful for taking full responsibility for what the atmosphere in my inner and outer worlds will be. I am grateful for the strength of my determination, and the valour with which I have picked up my sword to thrash away these silly thought patterns which arise and to choose with faith to keep my eyes and focus fixed on the Sun instead as the image of my source shining bright for me, no matter what! I am grateful for life and I am grateful for the new warrior me. I am grateful for the realization that aggression and attack can indeed be a part of a spiritual journey, and that I can use my warrior self to cut through the web of my own dysfunctional thoughts to see the sun shining beyond, rather than to launch an ill-informed attack on equally ignorant others, harmless messengers of growth, or innocent bystanders.
I am grateful to shed the 'scholar' 'seeker' as the only metaphors to use to visualize my inner selfs unfolding on my spiritual journey. i am grateful to take on the new and wonderful, responsibility laden, metaphors of 'hero', 'warrior' and 'magician' as well!
Thank You Universe for sending so many wonderful teachers and teachings, experiences and laboratories, learning and enjoyment in the way. Oh lovely source, you are always always there when I reach out for you, and I have a feeling that you are there even when i dont bother to reach out and just how wonderful is THAT?!
Love, Light, Blessings, and Excitement at the unfolding of the dark ages into light!
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